Pancakes

I just completed the biggest pancake party of the century.  Pancakes filled with everything imaginable; Dr Pepper, cyanide, chocolate, fruit, club soda, and combinations that would blow your mind out of the water like some kind of disgruntled mind pirate. Turns out the club soda myth was true. I guess it’s not a myth anymore. Almost like a little kid discovering that Unicorns roam the forests of northern California and nobody in the world believes him. Then one day by fate or chance some random schmoe comes along and destroys the serenity of the untouched, sacred ground that was once the Valley of Unicorn and proves to the world that we‘ve been wrong all along. It’s kind of scary. Everything we’ve ever been taught to believe was shattered in an instant. People died. Not at our party; but somewhere in the world our discovery killed someone. It’s sad to think that we’re responsible for the death of a middle-eastern nine year old that the Ronald McDonald Foundation was fighting to protect. Who knew that pancakes and unicorns could be so deadly from such a great distance…